I’ve had a poem brewing in my head for some time about the concept of “dying daily” and what it means to empty one’s self of…well…self in order to be a truly useful vessel for Christ while I’m in the world. The reason it’s a struggle for so many Christians is because it’s just darned hard to give up what you believe to be vital, your identity and sense of individuality, especially when the world touts its importance above everything else. However, we are in it as believers, not of it, and more is expected from us.
This is the result of my musings, and there will likely be other drafts to follow. I would truly appreciate any feedback or comments you would like to provide!
Please click on the image below for a full-screen version of the poem, which I have tentatively titled “Self-Actualization.”
8 thoughts on “A Little Thing Am I…”
I (i) find it fascinating that you use the capital “I” to explore the ego. Very creative. Maybe that’s what T.S. Elliott was getting at with his refusal to use capital letters…?
I’m no poetry expert, but I think that your poem would be more effective if you didn’t explain quite so much to the reader. If poetry’s art rests in its imagery, using the “I” is a brilliant start. You don’t need to explain much beyond how other possessive pronouns don’t require a capital letter. Use more allegory, less explanation to give the poem more of an ethereal or haunting feel. It will give the reader more to ponder.
Remember, this comes from someone who doesn’t write poetry and greatly admires your effort.
Thanks for the feedback! That’s what I was going for. I was playing around with multiple meaning words like “abdicate” with “empire” and the musicality of things like “lower caste of lowercase.” However, I think you’re right that more symbolism might behoove the work overall. I’ll give it a think-over and let you know when I rewrite. 🙂
A typical Jamie poem…. which may be interpreted as “nothing less than wonderful”.
Jim, you are entirely too kind. I wish I wrote half as well as you! It still needs a lot of work, but if you enjoyed it, that’s a reward in and of itself. 🙂 Love you, my friend!
I am not a poet either but I liked those two lines. I had never given a thought to why I is I not i (never noticed, truth be told, it’s something that simply “is”.). Leaving them in would make it appeal to those of us who don’t want to have to think too deeply. I find it very annoying to read something and not have a clue what the writer is trying to say. 🙂
Well, poetry is one of those things where sometimes less is more. I’m going to have to see if I can compromise and shorten it a tad. That line does assert itself a little too forcefully for my liking. I could likely take a bit off the top. However, I don’t want to lose the impact of the line either. It’s a hard balance to strike. Thanks for your input. I’ll consider it for draft four!
That is absolutely BEAUTIFUL! I started to say I don’t write poetry, either, but I do write songs, occasionally, and what are they, but poetry? Your poem took my breath away. (I had to look up “chiasmus.”) I also really liked the visual enhancement of the gap between the words “gap” and “in understanding.” I never connected the capitalization of “I” with ego before. Brilliant. I wanted to click “Like” about six times!
Thank you so much! I love everything about language—the way it looks on the page, the multiple meanings of words and how they play off one another, and even the way they sound when I say them! I’m a word nerd who just can’t help herself. Thank you so much for your kind comment!